TODAY'S TOP FIVE: Funnier Than Dennis Miller. So, Still Not Funny.
To Be Fair, He Wasn't Going to Be Doing Much Work Anyway Iraqi human rights minister Abdel Basset Turki has resigned over the U.S. sieges of Fallujah and Najaf (actually, he resigned on April 8, but the coalition authority has only now accepted his resignation). It's a good thing, because otherwise he'd have to resign over the prison torture scandal, and that might embarass the US. Ahem.
Perils of the Avant Garde In Madrid, a production of the controversial play "In God We Shit" was disrupted when the actors were attacked by audience members, who trashed equipment, beat people up, and tried to burn down the theater. Throughout the assault, the actors and playwright tried in vain to get help in stopping the attackers, but the rest of the audience thought the whole thing was part of the show. Say what you want about the artistic value of breaking the fourth wall, but that probably wouldn't happen during a production of "Our Town."
They Just Weren't Plucky Enough While the news media has predictably shit itself in joy over the escape of that Mississippi truck driver from his Iraqi captors (boy, I can't wait for that TV movie), they have just-as-predictably been silent on this development: While he was hot-footing it away from his jailers, 11 American soldiers were killed on Saturday and Sunday. Well, screw them: Merely dying the service of your country isn't a feel-good story we can all enjoy. Now, if one of those 11 had been a middling football player for a perpetually wretched NFL team...
Go to Plan B: Shoot Everybody The unlikely heroes of this last weekend were the members of the Likud Party, who rejected Ariel Sharon's dumbass plan to withdraw from Gaza while retaining a portion of the West Bank (they rejected it for the wrong reasons, but still). Sharon, who originally vowed that he would go ahead with the plan even if his party rejected it, will now "modify" it in some unspecified way and then resubmit it. Meanwhile, he is thinking of sacking American neocons' favorite politician, Benjamin Netanyahu, from the cabinet over the flap.
A Vomitorium for the Media If, like me, you spend most of your day hating the national press corps for its spineless kowtowing to a radical Rightist agenda, then I have good news: David Brock, former hit man for the radical Right who has since seen the light, has launched a web site detailing all the various smears, lies, and lunatic fringe elements to be found in the contemporary press. Keep in mind that these are the same folks who constantly harp about the "irrational hatred" that liberals have for Bush. With the words "irrational hatred" in mind, check out a sampling of articles Brock has up: "Fox's Chavez Called Kerry a 'Communist Apologist' and Then Lied About It," "Townhall Columnist Says Some Children Should Have Been Aborted," "The Federalist's Alexander Suggests Kerry Responsible for Soldier Deaths," "Coulter Lauded Discrimination Against Arab, Middle Eastern, and Muslim Passengers," etc. ad nauseum.
-Consider Arms