No, Seriously. WHAT THE FUCK.

50 Problems With the Death of Michael Berg's Son Hit me! A calm and well-researched article about the legion of anomalies surrounding Nicholas Berg and his death in Iraq. While not all of the 50 points will pan out over time, it is clear that things are definitely not what they seem.

There Are Really No Words For This

Born to Suck, Despite the Carbs Avril Lavigne is blaming carbs from her earlier "angry" lyrics (you know, like "He was a skater boy. She said see ya later boy.") and told an interviewer from the London Mirror, "I have always known I was going to be a star. I knew this was my destiny so things have fallen into place."” Not since Romeo and Juliette has destiny been so cruel. Born to Suck, With the Aliens
Hole bassist Melissa Auf Der Maur told MTV that "When I was 19, I dreamed aliens came down and told me to make music my life. These random individuals had been put into a pyramid to experience three-dimensional sound and then were put on a mission of passing it on. And in this dream, they said to me, 'Music has this power, and you'd better go and be a dutiful soldier to it.'" And we all thought Courtney was the wackjob of the outfit.

Still Fearing The Vagina Bomb Loyal MLWL readers will remember that this is not the first time we've reported on a vagina bomb.

The World Can Try, But Nobody Can Cockblock the Sikh Geek's Steez In another bizarre and insulting wrinkle in France's headgear fiasco, French Education Minister Francois Fillon said Monday that Sikh schoolchildren will be trading in their turbans for hair nets. "We've come up with an arrangement," Fillon said. "They accept wearing a hair net. It's less aggressive, less showy," he told The Associated Press. Apparently nobody in France's small Sikh community ever heard of this weird compromise, in fact they were told in a May 10th letter from a counselor to Prime Minister Jean-Pierre Raffarin of "conditional assurance" that Sikh boys could wear turbans in class. And Sara Kinnarney from MSNBC has written this article on like, how totally unattractive facial hair is on guys. "No facial hair at all, yuck!" said one woman interviewed.

-The Sikh Geek is scared of the news and is retreating intirrelevancece