Wednesday, July 07, 2004

TODAY'S TOP FIVE: Not Quite the Sum of Its Parts.

Is That the Sweet Taste of Schadenfreude? No one in America is happier about the NY Post's hideous blunder yesterday than the NY Daily News. In this article, the News quotes everyone from Mayor Bloomberg to Will Ferrell in character as an inept anchorman reveling in the Rupert Murdoch publication's misidentification, in a front page "exclusive" of Dick Gephardt as John Kerry's running mate. Meanwhile, MC No Shame is getting ready for an early retirement, with copies of the Post selling on Ebay for around $65.

The Four Freedoms, Iraqi-Style Well, that didn't take long. Despite the fact that a new age of human brotherhood has dawned in Iraq since the US gave an appointed council "sovereignty," it seems that in some ways the New Iraqi Freedom looks a lot like the Old Iraqi Oppression. The new prime minister has just given himself the power to execute people, order curfews anywhere in the country, ban political parties and other groups, and order the detention of anyone suspected of being a security risk.

Why Edwards is a Good Choice Here's EJ Dionne on why John Edwards is a good choice for Kerry's running mate. Dionne, as usual, makes some good points, but I can't help thinking that the best argument for Edwards is the fact that the diehard Republican I work with got furious yesterday when we heard that it was going to be Edwards instead of Gephardt. If the Republicans are upset, that has to be good news. Unless, of course, you're the Village Voice...

Why Didn't John Kerry Pick Mumia Abu Jamal? Or perhaps the convicted cop killer would be too conservative for the Voice. Here, in a depressingly predictable column, is James Ridgeway's take on the Kerry-Edwards ticket: "Why vote for the Dems? A Bermuda triangle of middle-class values, a/k/a Kerry's 'values of America' and Edwards's 'regular folks,' is not a call to enfranchise the poor or provide universal health care or equal justice. It means a tax cut here and there to help out the new middle class and things like more disclosure on pill bottles." I know! I can't believe the Democrats aren't calling for the proletariat to seize the means of production or to strangle the last capitalist with the guts of the last priest. Well, I guess that's just business as usual! I hate to keep hammering the Left, but somebody has to be the bloodhound, as Gustav Noske once remarked.

9/11 Panel Dismisses Evidence Obtained from Cheney's Secret Decoder Ring Last night, the panel appointed to investigate September 11 felt compelled to once again make it clear that, while Saddam and Al Qaeda had contacted each other, there was no collaboration whatsoever. They also felt the need to point out that, despite Dick Cheney's claims that Saddam and Osama piloted the planes into the World Trade Center together but parachuted out at the last minute, they have access to the same information Cheney is using to make his absurd claims, and that the info doesn't show a collaborative relationship at all. Will this finally make the vice-president stop lying to the American people. To quote the man himself: "Go fuck yourself."

-Consider Arms